Siena Blog

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Healthy Routines for Parents and Children 

Picture this:

It's a 2-hour weather delay, you’re already feeling the stress of the day because this means going into superhero mode. You still have to start work on time and make a miracle happen by finding childcare. You muscle through and make it work. You realize you are more stressed out than usual and not responding to familiar situations as you typically would.

You and your child are impacted because changes in routines bring many challenges. You may notice your child is more stressed, more forgetful, and more emotional than usual. This makes for a tough day ahead.

Learning is difficult because they are having trouble focusing and are easily distracted. Maybe they have been masking all day (so have you) and when they get home, all the emotions they have been suppressing are released when you ask them to pick up their coat off the floor. This could be just from a weather delay or another seemingly minor schedule disruption!

Thankfully, you’re not alone in these experiences. In my role as Siena’s counselor, I often remind families that there are plenty of ways to handle situations like this — to everyone’s benefit.

Learning Differences and Neurodiversity

Any time there is a change in routine or unstructured time, there is likely an accompanying increase in dysregulation. This is especially true for individuals with learning differences and neurodivergence. It is hard for children (and adults) to stay anchored in routines, especially with long breaks and altered schedules.

I can’t promise there won’t be days like this (sometimes it seems more often than not); however, I can offer support in developing ways to (1) Anchor your own emotional resilience and (2) Maintain routine throughout school breaks to reduce the frequency of dysregulation.

Children will often pay more attention to what adults do rather than what they say. Emotional resilience does not have to start at a crisis point, though: it starts with daily routines that foster grounding, self-care, and refueling your battery.

Self-Care Tips for Parents and Children

Here are 5 tips for you and your children to anchor in routines during long breaks or unplanned changes in schedule:

1. Consistency: Stay consistent with sleep routines. Veering too much from the regular sleep routine can throw off your circadian rhythm and lead to further dysregulation. As much as possible, keep within 30-60 minutes of the normal sleep and wake times.
2. Structure & Flexibility: Make a plan that is fun and provides needed structure. Aim for a balance of activities and scheduled downtime.
3. Movement: Remember that movement matters — especially for neurodiverse children! All their energy needs to be released. Plan movement opportunities to help with emotional regulation and improved sleep — especially ones that can be done indoors (such as having them use an exercise ball while gaming or watching TV).
4. Screen time: It’s a tough cycle to break: Too much screen time means less movement, which tends to increase dysregulation and sleep disturbances. Counteract this with Tips 1, 2, and 3 above, and set boundaries with screen time limits.
5. Consistency over perfection: Connect, communicate, and get creative. Take a deep breath. You’ve got this! P.S. Remember to laugh and get silly. It’s medicine for the soul.

Now, here are 3 tips to take care of you: 

1. Prioritize self-care: Give yourself permission to refuel your battery. Sometimes, as caretakers, we put everyone and everything ahead of our own needs. Always remember to care for yourself so you can show up as your best self for others.
2. Pause and breathe: When their angry monster comes out and pokes at your angry monster, do your best to take a pause before you react. That pause takes practice. A daily practice of grounding techniques (e.g., taking a break, drinking water, deep breathing, stretching, or journaling) goes a long way in effectively flexing your emotional resilience muscles.
3. Find your routines: Schedule in your daily care routines to make it a priority and stick to it: just like you would if it were your child’s doctor's appointment. Time for refuel matters. You can’t drive on an empty tank.

Anchoring your own emotional resilience is, in part, effectively managing stress and bouncing back from challenges.

When you are able to do this, you are modeling for your child how to take care of themselves and setting the tone for a calm and safe environment. You are also teaching them that you value yourself and others by the way you choose to show up in the world.

Resources from Siena’s Blog

See other posts of interest in our Social and Emotional Health blog category, such as these about Calming Strategies in the Classroom and online and offline boundaries for teens.

The Siena School, a national leader in dyslexia education currently in its 20th year, serves bright, college-bound students with dyslexia and other language-based learning differences on DC Metro area campuses in Silver Spring, MD (grades 3-4 and 5-12) and Oakton, VA (grades 3-12).